Today was NOT a good day and I promised to share my journey with you (through this blog) as I embark on the pursuit of my passion so here goes……
I left work today and immediately went home, logged onto my computer and started looking for another job! As I drove home from the office today, my mind was reeling! My thoughts & feelings vacillated between frustration in my current role, to hope that I can ultimately one day (very soon) work for myself! The frustration was due to my lack of control in my full-time job. It is quite frustrating to enjoy the work that you do, and to genuinely want to help students find jobs and internships but to work in an office where the budget is considerably less than my meager salary! Oh and since we are talking about salary, that was on my mind today too. I am also frustrated because while, YES I like my job…..I can’t really afford to keep it!!!! Let me paint a picture for you……
I drive an hour to and from work everyday (The cost of gas today is $3.20 on average). I drop my 2 kids off at a pre-school that is part of the institution I work for (which is also just a bit outside of my financial means….but thank GOD for their DAD’s contribution) and then head to the office. I forego my lunch, so that I can pick up my kids by 3pm….or I pay for aftercare…..again…expensive! All of this on the salary of an educator, with a Master’s Degree…..which isn’t anything to brag about. So I try to remind myself that I LIKE the work that I do. But I digress…..
For me, career counseling/coaching and programming is very enjoyable. What I do NOT enjoy is bureaucracy, small budgets, and being asked to do more with less, here lies my frustration. My day started well. I received an e-mail about a student who was struggling financially to stay in school but was able to get funding to get through this semester…..I was ecstatic! But soon came the e-mails about numbers being low, forwards that I really don’t need to read, and interruptions from co-workers as I try to simply get through the work piling up on my desk! Finally, once my door was closed, I found solace in getting through my “To Do” list and the one-on-one time I had with a couple of students. Before I know it, just as I get into a groove, it is time to go….but not before my supervisor unloads on me with all the “things” she’d like to “talk” to me about. REALLY?!?!? I was on my way out the door, and now just before I have to go pick up my children, I have to listen to THIS?!? Which bring us back to my drive home and my feeling overwhelmed. (Oh…and let me add that my car wouldn’t start immediately…it took 3 tries and almost 10 minutes)
As I drove home, I thought, “Today is a prime example of what drove me into a sales job before!” “I will just find another, BETTER PAYING job where I mostly work by myself until I REALLY get this Aspire2Higher business established.” The rest of my hour-long commute was spent thinking about all the other types of jobs I qualify for and where I should go to look for jobs. During my commute, I came to terms with the fact that I am blessed to be employed at all, but more importantly, I am blessed to have a VISION and PASSION in my career! Once I got home and fed the children, I did spend a little time perusing job search sites, then I re- focused my energy on my VISIONWORK! I started planning some events and workshops for Aspire2Higher, brainstorming ideas for locations and who to partner with, also factoring the costs for all this VISIONWORK. Before I knew it, I was officially overwhelmed. But Diary, I am here & now promising myself that I WILL NOT GIVE UP! I never thought that creating Aspire2Higher would be easy. In fact, most times I am worried, fearful that my (romantic) relationship is suffering, and afraid of being a failure. However, if these feelings are any indication that success will come because hard work & sacrifice pays off, then I just pray that I am on the right track.
Stephanie AKA Aspire2Higher
Well there you have it friends. What are your thoughts? Does success always come at a cost? Can anyone truly manage a full-time job and pursue a dream…while doing both successfully? Please share…..